It has been brought to my attention that I have been neglecting something with even knowing that was what i was doing. Now this unintentional neglect can be a deafening silence in any relationship. Words arent spoken and feelings get pushed back because of some the feeling of being scared to hurt. In avoiding this feeling, you may inturn being hurting the other person more because they arent getting what they are giving and then feeling unappreciated and resentment start to set in. Lets start at the beginning....
In starting to get to know someone there are different stages in which two people go through. The first stage is the realization that there is an attraction. The two of you go thru small gestures of jokes passed, flirting, and the beginning of "small talk". The next stage is infatuation, where you wanna see, be near, spend time with, and get to know the small fun stuff about a person. Then the next step is the crossroads....here's where it tricky. At most crossroads there are three ways a person or two people can decide to go, but the two being on the same page is the most important part; and both must be willing to take the same road. But if one of the persons isnt where the other is theres a place of stagnant and stale air and most likely boredom that develops. I am on the end of where I dont know which road to take because I have been neglectful of the small things that are so so important. Initiative goes a long way, and I have learned the hard that you must not only tell a person how you feel, but you have to make sure that your actions are at the same level. You cannot expect a person to always do while you sit back and hope and wonder. That is my fall back, scared of hurt and rejection. I've said this before and I will say again.... Having a titanium wall up protecting your heart can be actually hurting the other person and you not even knowing then resulting in a relationship that could go amazing go wrong, dont be afraid to hurt because there are 1000 smiles after that will help you learn from that. Take a step in a different less traveled direction and you just may end up where you wanted to in the beginning. You must be open minded and have a open heart that so all communication lines are open. I sometimes feel people (majority men) have a hard time expressing how they feel because they dont wanna hurt someone's feelings or they dont know how they themselves are gonna feel about it. I think I have developed thick skin and can take alot, but i cannot and shouldnt have to deal with non-communication. As much as I joke about having #powers, I nor do I think anyone else has the power of reading minds. Therefore speak your mind and let others deal with the information they have just received.
Back to the crossroad....If you have been neglectful unintentionally, turn it around by taking a step in showing that you are sincerely apologetic and want to make up for the actions or lack thereof. Take it day by day because the hurt doesnt go away immediately but you both have to open enough to put it behind you and move forward. A relationship that comes from communication, openness, trust and alot of work will make it because the two of you will be on the same page consistently. You wont always be on the same page, no two people are but finding your way back can be hard but benenficial in life and relationship learnings.
I leave you by saying this, take your time and really think on both sides of the fence. Your side may or may not be the best and thats why its sometimes to go to another yard and see how things are planted, you may find that your plants need each other to coincide.
Peace
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