Maturity is defined as the state of being fully developed. Now what leads up to maturity is my question... Is it the experiences or things taught to you that make you mature?? Is it what your friends and family tell you what you should or shouldn't do?? What you read in books? Honestly its all these things, without it you would still be in the mindset of a 2 year old toddler.
I feel this goes for relationships as well, people need to be mature in handling situations of a relationship. There are a lot of people out here who wanna be in relationships that are relationally immature, and from that they either break a lot of hearts or continually get their heart broken. These "heartbreakers" I feel are the ones that are the most immature because they are dealing with a lot of fear. Fear is something that comes from a lot of unknown or uncertainty of the future. Now granted beng unsure of what's to come happens to us all, I guess I'm just more adventurous and am willing to step into the unknown and see what happens. "Heartbreakers" get to a certain point, reach the unknown and wanna run. Therefore leading to the second person...."the brokenhearted". These are the individuals (like myself) are open and communicative, show and tell everything that they feel and wear their hearts on their sleeve. These people are immature in taking the lessons learned and using them to their advantage or personal growth. Thus falling into the same thing over and over.
A major step in becoming mature enough for relationships is communication. Both parties learn so much from each other (good and bad) through speaking what's on your mind. People are afraid to say what's on their minds for two reasons....either they don't know how to convey they feelings which leads to misleading thoughts (one of my past posts) and strain on the relationship. The other reason would be they don't wanna stir up emotions whether good or bad. Neither of these approaches work in a relationship because one of the parties is unaware of the others feeling so then neither person can really give 100%. Say how you feel, come to a compromise and really do what is said because as the old cliche goes.... Actions speak louder than words.
I spoke about compromise in the first step, compromise is listening and coming to a common ground that will not only be good for both parties, but will help the relationship grow. In compromising both parties have to be willing to sacrifice something. Sacrificial decisions are often hard because you give up something that you have come accustomed to when by yourself, but when someone else is now in this with you that things has to become something secondary. It was brought to my attention by a friend that Carrie (Sex and the City) gave up smoking for Aiden. That was a sacrificial decision. Sacrificing does NOT mean losing yourself, but altering decisions you make for the betterment of your relationship. Sacrificing and compromising go hand in hand.
Being relationship mature doesn't come overnite and there will be many challenges along the way. But being relationship immaturity is draining and doesn't get anywhere. If you care for someone tell them....if you want to be with someone, be with them and take it day by day. Its a learning experience don't rush and be open to everything that you learn. Don't be afraid to love, love hard and love whole-heartedly, and let it take you to places you've never been. Grow and be mature and you will find love will return the favor.
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